Wednesday, July 27, 2005

The Island

I was soooo determined to hate this movie, I mean you have no idea. I saw all the previews for this movie, and putting all three of those previews together, everything that happened in this movie was absolutely ruined for me. So in that aspect, yeah, I really hated this movie, but then Sonya yelled and me and made me think things over a bit, and I've come to the conclusion that it actually was a pretty good movie - especially when you don't know what happens. (Don't you just hate spoilers? Doesn't it just make you wanna rip a certain someone's jugular out?)

There were still a few things about the movie that bothered me, like the complete un-originality of it. It was Logan's Run meets 1984, meets Bad Boys, coupled with a direct rip-off of the bike scene from Return of the Jedi. The direction was... okay at best. The lighting was very pretty, but Michael Bay has a certain fondness for moving the camera around - A LOT - so half the time I felt like I was having a seizure. Some scenes were impossible to watch. For example, the only two things the previews didn't ruin were how they escaped, and how they survived falling off the building, and after seeing the film I still have no idea how they pulled that one off!

So yeah, go see it, because it was a lot of fun, and the second Ewan McGregor starts smiling and speaking in an Scottish accent... well... *trails off into gibberish*

Wedding Crashers

I really didn't think this movie was going to be very good, and the only real reason I wanted to see it in the first place was because Vince Vaughn was in it, but I couldn't believe how funny it actually was. For a good half-hour straight the theatre was just non-stop laughing.

Now, of course all movies can't be great. The last half-hour of this movie was rather... slow, boring even. In fact, the movie could have done better to have simply cut to the last five minutes, which were also very funny (I really doubt anyone would have noticed the missing plot, being that the movie was just a runaway idea about sleeping with chicks at weddings).

So, if you want a good laugh, go see this movie, especially if you wanna see a lot of tits in the first few minutes.

Sunday, July 17, 2005

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

I've been having a hard time putting what I thought about this movie into words. The two words that seem to come to mind the most are: "Overly Trippy"

Yes, I liked this movie, but by the end of it I wasn't sure if I was still sane. It was like having one of the worst trips of your life, and all the time dealing with the fact that you are sober. When the Oompa Loompas came out, I thought I would have a heart attack.

All-in-all the movie was good, and very funny, and I was quite impressed with the sceneries and effects (though very disappointed that Willy Wonka's rant got cut out - you know there one: "There's no earthly way of knowing / Which direction we are going / There's no knowing where we're rowing / Or which way the river's flowing / Is it raining? / Is it snowing? / Is a hurricane a-blowing? / Not a speck of light is showing / So the danger must be growing / Are the fires of hell a-glowing? / Is the grisly reaper mowing? / Yes, the danger must be growing / 'Cause the rowers keep on rowing / And they're certainly not showing / Any signs that they are slowing.").

Now, I didn't think Johnny Depp would do a better job than Gene Wilder, and I was absolutely right. There just wasn't the same heart in the character... or any heart really. He was in fact a completely different character and I wasn't all that sure if I liked it. Freddie Highmore was adorable, I had nothing against him.

The ending seemed to run on a bit, and I much preferred the way the original ended, because there was a lot more heartbreak when Willy Wonka started screaming at him... Anyway, I suggest you go see this movie. Just DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT see this movie stoned. YOU WILL DIE.

Monday, July 11, 2005

Fantastic Four

Well... it started off well enough.

At the beginning I was still feeling the exitment of watching this movie, but the more Jessica Alba was on screen, the more I wondered why anyone thought she could act, and why they made Ioan Gruffud act like such a pussy when he was such a bad-ass in King Arthur. I had no problems with Michael Chiklis or Chris Evans, in fact, they're the only reasons I liked that movie at all.

Doom started off alright, but then he just got weird, and was nothing like he is in the comics. The more the movie kept running, the more corny it got, and the more I was just counting the seconds until Chris Evans came back on.

I'd say it was worth it to see the effects on the big screen... only there weren't really any effects worth seeing on the big screen. All-in-all, this is a movie you should wait to rent.

Howl's Moving Castle

It's my personal opinion (shared by many) that Hayao Miyazaki can do no evil. That, and adding the fact that they cast the lovely Christian Bale in this movie, I am of the opinion that this movie rocked! (Especially being that I saw it after such an attrocious movie like War of the Worlds)

I've never read the book (by Diana Wynne Jones), but the movie was great. It was very imaginative, and dare I say it, romantic. From the very beginning I was sucked into this world they created, and the characters (one voiced by Billy Crystal) kept me wanting to watch more.

Really there's nothing bad to say about this movie. You might not like it if you don't like anime all that much, though I think anyone could enjoy this for what it is.

And hey, Jean Simmons was in the english version (no, not the singer from Kiss, but the chick who played Ophelia opposite Lawrence Olivier)!

War of the Worlds


There are many bad things I can say about this, and sadly very few good things I can say. I loved the book. The book still remains one of my all-time favourites... but the movie was terrible.

Firstly, I was terribly bored. I wanted to see lots of explossions and battles, and got none. I wanted to see aliens, and all I got was tri-pod rip-offs of Independence Day.

Steven Spielberg simply reharshed Close Encounters of the Third Kind and Jurassic Park and figured he'd get away with it by using a famous book and a couple famous actors. This did not work. You felt nothing for Tom Cruise (possibly because the man's barking mad!), Dakota Fanning would not stop screaming, and I wanted to punch Justin Chatwin very, very badly. It was meant to be a family film, but I hated the family!

The book was absolutely butchered, the movie held onto very little from it. There was Ogilvy, and a shadow of the boat scene... and nothing that would entice anyone to want to see this movie again.